Kristaps Porzingis for President of Earth!
Everyone needs to pump the brakes on the Kristaps Porzingis train or it’s liable to derail. Dion Waiters eyes greener pastures in… Philadelphia? Matt and Bob go head-to-head in another edition of the Brickhouse Gameshow. And the Rockets are 4–7? Is it time to panic?
In a tour de force showing we cover 19 segments for 2019 and examine the phenomenon of the 5-0 Austin Rivers Rockets. We compare the Warriors to The Avengers and Lonzo Ball and Kyle Kuzma to 18th century English royalty lesbians. Old segments are resurrected that were out of style years ago. Predictions are made for the most egregious Zion Williamson tanking candidates and which team will make a trade offer for Beyonce. Test your word association skills with our NBA SAT quiz. Plus a medley of all your favorite songs, music cues and soundbites. Diss of the Week submissions from Spurs fans, David Blatt, Danny Ainge and Chris Paul.
The return of the holiday tradition! Questions your local bloggers are too afraid to ask like, “What movie will LeBron take the Lakers to see to teach them what lesson?” And, “Since when did the Elf on the Shelf become a thing?” We introduce our new Serbian Brickhouse correspondent and discuss the team owned by Europe’s most powerful agent. Plus a marketing campaign with Anthony Davis as the NBA’s first open-vampire. Diss of the week submissions from Greta Rogers, Bill Simmons and Matt Barnes. Serbian listeners download Kladovina now!
The worst NBA teams started changing personnel this week and even more are rumored to follow suit. It took less than a week for the Bulls new coach to nearly cause a player walkout. Likewise it was three days before Joel Embiid voiced frustration with his role next to Jimmy Butler. The constantly warring Washington Wizards can’t understand how management traded everyone’s favorite teammate. Plus rumors about a Suns trade and the Wolves possible new coach. Oh, and Steph Curry becomes the latest point-guard role model to deny science.
To celebrate the holiday we discuss our eight biggest stories of the week. Like how Fred Hoiberg may have lost the team, and when. And how New Balance lost all their potential NBA endorsers until finally landing Kawhi. We weigh the possibility of John Wall trade rumors to the Lakers and Knicks and discuss the people pulling the strings behind them. The Rockets may look terrible but that isn’t stopping Chris Paul from talking trash to everyone. Plus, Joakim Noah to Memphis, Nikola Jokic for MVP of my heart, and Steph Curry’s revelation to try to market his shoes to girls. Diss of the Week submissions from a Wizards season ticket holder and Kobe Bryant.
The season’s already a quarter finished and a few would-be playoff contenders look pretty finished too. The western conference features 14 competitive teams as well as Matt Baker’s Phoenix Suns. What’s worse? Bad analytics or bad chemistry? Have the Warriors driven the Rockets crazy? How are the Sacramento Kings this good? We also weigh in on this season’s worst teammates and the players most deserving of a raise. Diss of the week submissions from and Jimmy Butler, Mike Malone and Bobby Portis… kind of.
We always knew the only team that could stop the Warriors was the Warriors. And if any one player would be the one to tear it all down, it was always going to be Draymond Green. As the rumors swirl about what was said on the bench and in the locker room we’re here to fan the flames. The crazy thing about speculating on Draymond Green quotes is that you can picture him saying almost anything. Nothing is too offensive. Golden State is not the only place for drama though. We discuss the exploding tension in Washington DC and examine the latest chapter in the ballad of Markelle Fultz.
Tom Thibodeau finally found a trade for his disgruntled star, Jimmy Butler. If Butler thought Wiggins and Towns were too fragile just wait until he gets a load of Fultz! We examine how the shockwaves of the trade ripple throughout the league. Everyone from fans of the Chicago Bulls, to Jimmer Fredette, to ‘The Goonies’ movie felt it. Plus, the Rockets may not just be losing out on just Jimmy this week, but Carmelo too. Warriors execs hilariously lure fans with offer of $100 tickets to games with zero view. And it might be time to panic about Dwight Howard and the Washington Wizards.
Three weeks into the NBA season we’ve identified the coaches, players and teams that have found the perfect match. There’s still more teams throwing dishes and sleeping on the couch. Mike Budenholzer found a newer, younger European partner, while Jimmy Butler and the Timberwolves look like Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren. The Cavs need counseling for their coaches and their veteran shooting guard. The Wizards only consistency is their dysfunction and Kawhi on the Raptors seems about as real as Kim Kardashian’s TV wedding special. Plus, a Diss of the Week featuring Fergie’s ex-husband versus the Golden State Warriors.
Well it didn’t take long for one of the Lakers’ “meme team” to get into trouble, did it? Those punches were some of the only defense we’ve seen played this season! LeBron moved to LA for the entertainment business and his team is already delivering it on the court despite their slow start. We break down the biggest losers from Saturday’s fracas while also highlighting who benefits the most. That we already have an NBA conspiracy one week into the season is why this show exists and why we’re fans. Plus a the Marc Stein/Shams Charnia Battle Royale in our ‘Diss of the Week.’